Dear [Insert Game Dev Name here],

I don't like [insert game mechanic here] because it is not what i assumed the game would be when i sped through reading the feature list and assumed what the game was like after a friend told me what it was like and i wasnt really listening.

I therefore want a refund of [insert cost here] because I am an impatient tool who is so self important that any inconvenience I face is a direct insult to me personally, and I refuse to listen to reason, or, in fact read anything pertaining to the game, ever.
My opinions are more important than the rest of the people who have been supporting [insert game name here] because I have been playing [insert game genre here] for a couple of years and therefore know everything.

I expect you to be heartbroken by my sheer idiocy and beg me to reconsider.

Yours Pompously,
Generic Moron Gamer

This is a work of fiction, any similarities to you, you stupid berk, is purely coincidental, and if you have any complaints please contact stfu@youwhineyfool.com.