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  1. #11
    Quote Originally Posted by willbonney View Post
    Eh, least I'm entertaining with my bumps.
    Need an ally?

  2. #12
    Time for another bad joke bump:

    An 80-year old man was having his annual check-up and the doctor asked him how he was feeling. "I've never been better!" he boasted. "I've got an eighteen year old bride who's pregnant and having my child! What do you think about that?"

    The doctor considered this for a moment, then said, "Let me tell you a story. I knew a guy who was an avid hunter. He never missed a season. But one day, he went out in a bit of a hurry, and he accidentally grabbed his umbrella instead of his gun." The doctor continued, "So he was in the woods, and suddenly a grizzly bear appeared in front of him! He raised up his umbrella, pointed it at the bear and squeezed the handle. And do you know what happened?" the doctor queried. Dumbfounded, the old man replied, "No." The doctor continued, "The bear dropped dead in front of him!" "That's impossible!" exclaimed the old man. "Someone else must have shot that bear."

    "That's kind of what I'm getting at," replied the doctor.

    (think about it a moment, in a second you'll get it, many have a think about the last few lines of this one to understand the punch-line, lol)

  3. #13
    New joke bump:

    A doctor walked into a bank. Preparing to endorse a check, he pulled out a rectal thermometer from his shirt pocket and tried to 'write' with it. Realizing his mistake, he looked at the thermometer with annoyance and said, "Well that's great, just great... some asshole's got my pen."

  4. #14
    My turn!!!


    Evidence has been found that William Tell and his family were avid bowlers. However, all the league records were unfortunately destroyed in a fire.
    Thus we'll never know for whom the Tells bowled.

  5. #15
    In keeping with this tradition...

    There once was a king who lived in two-story grass hut. Every holiday the king demanded to be given a new throne as a gift. As soon as a new throne arrived, he would store the old throne on the second level of his hut and use the new one instead. But one day the hut collapsed from the weight of all the thrones, and everyone was crushed and killed.

    The moral of this story? Those who live in grass houses shouldn't stow thrones.

  6. #16
    A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He sidles up to the bar and announces:
    "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."



    Only a few more days til "Final Wipe"!!

  7. #17
    A woman in the post apocalyptic future finds a bottle near Lake Tahoe and upon uncorking it releases a Genie. The Genie informs that for freeing him he will grant her one wish. She pulls out a map of Lake Tahoe and says, "I wish for peace between all the tribes in the Lake Tahoe area so we can live in harmony and share junk piles together in a civil manner without worry of pkers, griefers, forum trolls, or hackers".

    The Genie looks at her and replies, "I possess great power but even I cannot fulfill such a tall order. Human nature is a hard thing to control and it would be a monumental task trying to fulfill that wish. There must be something else I can grant you..". The woman thought for a minute and replied, "Then I'd like a husband from the Regulators. One that doesn't drink, doesn't swear, and will help me cook, clean and perform all other chores that I currently do".

    The Genie scratches his head and then angrily replies, "Son of a... Let me see the damn map again!"

    Come join the Regulators folks!

  8. #18
    I just applied for membership on your website under the name CrookedCreek. Sounds like the perfect Tribe.

  9. #19
    Howdy CrookedCreek

    Awful joke time...

    Located in Lake Tahoe, there were two bounty hunters, Max and Paddy. One day, the two were enjoying a strong drink in the local saloon, when a man walked into the bar with a Griefers head under his arm.

    The barman shakes his hand and says, "I hate Griefers, last week they naked rushed me while I was doing a bit of fishing and stole my favourite rod and grass hat.

    He then says, "If any man brings me the head of a Griefer, I'll give him one thousand bottle caps." The two bounty hunters looked at each other and walked out of the bar to go hunting for a Griefer. They were walking around for a while when suddenly they saw one; Jeff threw a rock which hit the Griefer right on the head. The Griefer fell seventy feet down a ravine.

    The two bounty hunters made their way down the ravine where Max pulled out a knife to claim their trophy.

    Suddenly, Paddy said, "Max, take a look at this."
    Max replied, "Not now, I'm busy."
    Paddy tugged him on the shoulder and says, "I really think you should look at this."
    Max said, "Look, you can see I'm busy. There's a thousand bottle caps in my hand."
    But Paddy was adamant. "Please, Max, take a look at this."

    So Max looked up and saw that standing at the top of the ravine were five thousand naked Griefers. Max just shook his head and said, "Oh my God, we're going to be millionaires!"

    Come join the Regulators, we'll Make Ya' famous!

  10. #20
    Here's another:

    A young man excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in love and is going to get married. He says, "Just for fun, Ma, I'm going to bring over three women and you try and guess which one I'm going to marry." The mother agrees. The next day, he brings three beautiful women into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for a while. He then says, "Okay, Ma. Guess which one I'm going to marry." She immediately replies, "The red-head in the middle." Stunned, the young man says, "That's amazing, Ma. You're right. How did you know?"

    "I don't like her," she says.

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